Work diligently with your mate--coming from a place of love, trust, and understanding--to resolve unhandled conflict. This type of conflict can create a spirit of fear and distrust.
Start by bringing yourself to a place of trust. Compel yourself to offer only unconditional tolerance and understanding. When you arrive at the place of trust begin the work of resolution--conflict resolution. The process is what you make it. Practice creating trusting and peaceful processes.
Extend to your mate (1) the common courtesy of listening and (2) the trust that he deserves. Do not make any assumptions. Listen, seek understanding, do not react with your hurt. You are there to rid you both of the pain, anger, fear, and misunderstanding that has brought you do this work. Be relentless at achieving resolution.
If you reach a point in the process where you are unable to come to resolution, then resolve to revisit to process. Go away and pray and make the request of your mate to do the same. Seek in yourself what you want in him.
When the time is right, and you will know, because your desire for true peace in your marriage, will lead you to that space, revisit the process, again coming from a place of trust and unconditional understanding. Give every issue at hand (1) grave consideration, (2) contemplation, and (3) a commitment to eradication. That's right, promise your mate, yourself, and your marriage that once this conflict is resolved you two will be committed to not revisiting this place.
Continue this process until you both reach an amicable resolution and your marriage is free of this conflict, as there is work to be done is other areas of your relationship.
Remember, problems that go away by themselves come back-by themselves. Leaving an open door is leaving an open invitation for the enemy to do his work.
Contributed by MJ Hunt
Quote courtesy of Marriage Works
